CHRISTMAS COUNTDOWN ADVENT BLOG Tuesday 8th December 2020
12 RAMBLINGS OF CHRISTMAS
ONLY 17 SLEEPS TO CHRISTMAS
- A CHRISTMAS QUOTE
Being a traditionalist, I’m a rabid sucker for Christmas. In July, I’m already worried that there are only 146 shopping days left.- John Waters
- CHRISTMAS FEATURE – CHRISTMAS CRACKER JOKE OF THE YEARDominic Cummings gag voted Christmas cracker joke of the year.
Moments of light relief have been hard to come by this year but the annual ranking of topical Christmas cracker jokes provides some, with the top spot taken by one that has a punchline featuring a Chris Rea song and Dominic Cummings.
The TV channel Gold’s eighth annual ranking, which is chosen by a panel chaired by the comedy critic Bruce Dessau, was put to 2,000 voters who chose: “What is Dominic Cummings’ favourite Christmas song? Driving Home for Christmas”, as the best cracker joke this year.
Other entries riff on more Covid-related themes, with punchlines ranging from quips about pirates and the R number to festive groaners about reindeer and herd immunity.
Dessau said during one of the “strangest and most turbulent years yet, we can always rely on British humour to pull us through”.
The top 10 cracker jokes
- What is Dominic Cummings’ favourite Christmas song? Driving Home for Christmas.
- Did you hear that production was down at Santa’s workshop? Many of his workers have had to Elf isolate!
- Why didn’t Mary and Joseph make it to Bethlehem? All Virgin flights were cancelled.
- Why are Santa’s reindeer allowed to travel on Christmas Eve? They have herd immunity.
- Why did the pirates have to go into lockdown? Because the “Arrrr!” rate had risen.
- Why is it best to think of 2020 like a panto? Because eventually, it’s behind you.
- Why couldn’t Mary and Joseph join their work conference call? Because there was no Zoom at the inn.
- Why can’t Boris Johnson make his Christmas cake until the last minute? He doesn’t know how many tiers it should have.
- What do the Trumps do for Christmas dinner? They put on a super spread.
- Which Christmas film was 30 years ahead of its time? Home Alone.
between you and me I do think there was loads of material to come up with a better Trump joke.
3. CHRISTMAS MOVIE
4. CHRISTMAS SONG
- Santa Baby Kylie Minogue 3:22
5. CHRISTMAS CHILDREN’S BOOK
There’s an Elf in Your Book (Who’s in Your Book?) by Tom Fletcher and Greg Abbott |
Paperback : 32 pages
Publisher : Puffin
Age Range: 2-6 years
GOLLY GUMDROPS . . . A LITTLE ELF HAS FOUND THEIR WAY INTO YOUR BOOK!
What does Elf want?
Oh! Just to see if you’ve been naughty or nice this year!
Elf will ask you a few simple questions to find out. And surely there won’t be any tricks to try and get you to be naughty . . . will there?
Hmmm, this could be quite a tricksy little elf. You’d better keep your wits about you if you want to make it on to Santa’s Nice List!
A fantastically fun and uniquely interactive treat from the creators of There’s a Monster in Your Book. Discover a wonderful new Christmas tradition in a book to read again and again.
6. CHRISTMAS CAROL
7. IT’S A CRACKER (CHRISTMAS CRACKER JOKE)
Why does Donald Trump have his Christmas dinner on a plastic plate? He doesn’t get on with China
8. EVERY CHRISTMAS TV TIMES COVER
9. A FAMOUS SCROOGE
10. SOMETHING TO LAUGH ABOUT – A TOP TV CHRISTMAS SPECIAL FROM THE PAST
Cheers – Christmas Cheers
USA/Season 6/1987Aired on NBC
“Christmas Cheers” is the third Christmas episode of the NBC sitcom Cheers, originally aired as the twelfth episode of the show’s sixth season. Synopsis. Christmas Eve is depressing at Cheers as Sam rushes to find Rebecca a gift, Rebecca makes everyone work late, and Norm’s Santa Claus buddies gather to celebrate the end of the season.
Christmas Cheers Ted Danson as Sam Malone Kirstie Alley as Rebecca Howe Rhea Perlman as Carla Tortelli John Ratzenberger as Cliff Clavin George Wendt as Norm Peterson Woody Harrelson as Woody Boyd Kelsey Grammer as Frasier Crane.
11. NICE LITTLE CHRISTMAS NUMBER
71 $4.5 million Macauley Caulkin earnings from the movie.
72 1 time. Donald Trump makes a (thankfully brief) appearance when Kevin first arrives at the Plaza Hotel in Home Alone.
73 $476.7 million Home Alone total Box Office to date
74 $18 million Home Alone Production Budget
75 £77.56bn Brits spent on Christmas in 2016, up by 1.9% on the previous year and almost double the European average.
76 £18,000,000,000 – will be withdrawn from UK cash machines over Christmas.
77 £809.97 each UK home on average splashes out at Christmas; on food and drink, travel, decorations and presents, with the latter accounting for 58.5 per cent of the budget.
78 28 Lego sets are sold EVERY SECOND in the Christmas period
79 £7,000,000 – The most expensively dressed Christmas tree was valued at just under £7,000,000 and was erected and displayed by the Emirates Palace in Abu Dhabi, UAE, from 16 to 29 December 2010.
80 194,672 – The most lights lit simultaneously on a Christmas tree is 194,672 and was achieved by Kiwanis Malmedy and Haute Fagnes in Malmedy, Belgium, on 10 December 2010.
12. CHRISTMAS TV ADVERT