Ewan: 2½ years old & George 16 months old NEWS BLOG 12.10.2017

Ewan: 2½ years old & George 16 months old NEWS BLOG

Sooty Live at Mansfield and Trolls in Strictly

Ewan:                    Hi George. I thought we’d review the Sooty Show this week.

George:                  It’s hardly current affairs or World News.

Ewan:                    Depends how you look at it.

George:                  There was only one way to look at it, sit in your seat or on Grandad’s knee.

Ewan:                    Yes, yes or Mamma’s Knee, or my dad’s knee.

George:                  No, only Grandad’s knee. I’m not fickle like you.

Ewan:                    Look in any newspaper or at any TV or media news item and they do entertainment reviews.

George:                  Well, I think it is opting out of what we are supposed to be doing.

Ewan:                    Alright name me something interesting in the news this week that is suitable for a 16 month old..

George:                  …Actually I’ve reached 17 months old this week, not that anyone gives a damn.

Ewan:                    …and a 2½ year old can talk about.

George:                  Everything’s about Harvey Weinstein.

Ewan:                    Do you understand that enough to talk about it, George?

George:                  You know I don’t.

Ewan:                    So let’s review Entertainment and inparticularly the Sooty Show.

Oh and if we are reviewing entertainment we have to give the Trolls dance on Strictly a mention. It was brilliant.

Singer Aston Merrygold and partner Janette Manrara topped the leaderboard again as they scored 35 points out of 40 for their hip-hop-infused Cha Cha. They dressed as Poppy and Branch from the Trolls movie and danced to Justin Timberlake’s Can’t Stop The Feeling.

George:                  You can’t leave it alone, can you, always got to try and get it in.

Ewan:                    I know you saw it. You’ve got to admit it was a good routine.

George:                  Yes, I saw it. Mamma is as bad as you. She sent the clip on Whatsapp and Mum showed me.

Ewan:                    Not bad for a singer with the band JLS.

George:                  I can dance as good as him.

Ewan:                    I think we all can, except Grandad. But we are not in Strictly Come Dancing.

George:                  I’m bored, let’s talk Sooty.

Ewan:                    Yes, let’s.

Grandad and Mamma paid good money to take us to The Sooty Show at Mansfield, Palace Theatre.

George:                  Yes and it was Goose Fair weekend. Why did they take us to see Sooty and not Goose Fair?

Ewan:                    They think we are too young for Goose Fair.

George:                  I suppose there are lots of death defying rides, we’d never be allowed to go on.

Ewan:                    Do you mean like: Air, Airmaxx, AtmosFear, Bomber Mach 2, Crazy Bulls, the Giant Wheel, Moondance, Mouse coasters, Reverse Bungee, Rock Rage, Sea Storm, Star Flyer, Dodgems, Dragon Coaster, Extremes, Freakouts, Frogs, Ghost Trains, Matterhorns, Miamis, Sizzler Twists, Superbowls, Super Spins, Super Stars, as well as Waltzers and Funhouses.

George:                  No, actually I was thinking the top deck of the double decker bus on the kiddies merry-go-round.

Ewan:                    I see what you mean. Yeh, you could fall off the top of that.  Scary, Mary.

Mamma would never let you ride that.

George:                  Grandad would though.

He loves living dangerously.

Ewan:                    If he let us, who would be in the most danger, us or Grandad?

George:                  Grandad because of the actions Mamma would take when she found out he had allowed us on the bus.

So, why did they take us to see Sooty?

Visit Sooty Site

Ewan:                    Historical I think.

Sooty first appeared in 1949, the year Grandad was born.

He first appeared on TV in 1952, the year Mamma was born.

And in 2002 he managed to break the record for being the longest running kids’ TV programme ever.

George:                  2002 when nothing happened.

Don’t know why they took me to see it. It went totally over my head.

Ewan:                    And mine.

A yellow bear. What bear species is yellow?

George:                  The only way he can communicate is by whispering in that Richard Cadell guy’s ear.

Ewan:                    And Sweep, a dog then can only communicate by squeaking. Doesn’t even bark!

Ewan:                    The only one that talks sense and looks like a real bear is the panda, Soo.

George:                  Mamma says that’s because she’s female.

Ewan:                    Mamma is very sexist.

Your dad was the only member of the family who didn’t go to the theatre. A very sensible guy, but why was that?

George:                  Auntie Jayne and Uncle Steve gave us another cousin, Erin.

I’ve seen her. She looks like…like…a baby. But a brilliant baby. She looks fun. I’m looking forward to growing up with her and her brother.

Ewan:                    Wow, a bit of competition for me and Rory, eh?

George:                  It’s good to keep you on your toes.

Ewan:                    So how did that mean your dad couldn’t see Sooty?

George:                  He said he had to go and wet the baby’s head.

Ewan:                    Doesn’t your Auntie Jayne and Uncle Steve know how to wash the baby’s head?

George:                  Obviously not.

Ewan:                    But your dad might have liked the Sooty Show.

My dad and Grandad and Rory and Freya were in hysterics laughing at it.

George:                  They have a basic, slapstick, childish sense of humour. I’ve not

Ewan:                    I know. I did not break into a smile once, throughout the show.

George:                  I did because I am a naturally happy child.

Ewan:                    B******, George. You won’t be in a minute.

I have to say I was a little peed off.

George:                  I suppose I was but why were you, Ewan.

Ewan:                    That little band of pilgrims had put a show together, filled the theatre beyond capacity twice that day and had been paid a huge fortune of good money purely for being naughty. Especially that Sooty.

George:                  And he has a nationwide TV show on CITV. Famed for him doing naughty things.

Ewan:                    If I’m naughty there’s no special acclaim, stage show or TV series I am humiliatingly put on the naughty step.

There is no justice in the world.

And that’s why I couldn’t bring myself to laugh at dear, Mr Sooty and his antics.

George:                  Although I did have a little smile at some of his tricks.

Ewan:                    I know and then when he squirted the audience with real water from his water pistol. I have to admit, I laughed out loud at that.

George:                  And all his noise making contraptions.

Ewan:                    I would just love his magic wand. Imagine what we could do with Sooty’s magic wand.

Izzy, wizzy, let’s get busy.

George:                  Maybe we could go on X-factor and do some of naughty things and get a TV show.

Ewan:                    That’s Britain’s Got Talent, George.

George:                  Same guy different hat.

Ewan:                    I also loved the dancing in the Sooty Show. At least that bit was great.

Reminded me of Strictly.

George:                  Let’s cut it there.

But talking of reminding reminded me that I have not said:

Welcome, to my world. Won’t you come on in?

Ewan:                    Too late, George.

We are going.

Bye Bye

George:                  Bye Bye