EWAN’S BLOG: (4 YRS) – TOY REVIEW TV

EWAN’S BLOG: (4 YRS) – TOY REVIEW TV

jeanniejeanniejeannie.co.uk BLOG 22nd March 2019

Hi Ewan here.

 

TV figures a lot in all our lives, especially us children. But we are constantly told screen time should be minimal, because it is bad for us. But it’s not it’s an important part of our lives, to help us learn and understand the world around us. So parents stop worrying and accept that’s life.

 

Us children just cannot seem to get it through to adults, except Grandad that screen time is great for us. I’m not sure why Grandad understands this issue. Most things he doesn’t understand but he does seem to allow us to watch all the TV we want.

 

Just imagine if I’d never seen Angry Birds on TV. I would have gone through life not knowing they existed. Can you imagine that? So that alone shows how important screen time is for educating us and giving us a well balanced and rounded life.

 

One kid’s parents who seem to have no issue with TV is Ryan a Texan kid who does a toy review TV programme on YouTube.

 

Ryan Toys Review was the No.1 earner on YouTube in 2018 netting $22 million. He’s a 7-year-old boy named Ryan who reviews toys for other kids.

 

In 2017, it was reported Ryan made $11 million from his YouTube channel, coming in at number 8 on Forbes’ 2017 list, but the toy critic is moving on up. His YouTube channel has attracted a huge following of parents and children who watch Ryan test out new toys and share his thoughts on them.

 

Ryan, whose last name has not been made public, first started reviewing toys in 2015 when he was just 4 years old. On his channel, Ryan’s parents write: “He loves Cars, Trains, Thomas and friends, Lego, Superheroes, Disney toys, open surprise eggs, Play Doh, Pixar Disney cars, Disney Planes, monster trucks, minions, playtime at the fun, family fun adventure and so much more!”

 

Ryan’s family says the child star was inspired by watching other kids and programs on YouTube and wanted to join the fun.

 

His most-watched video to date featured huge Easter eggs and a bouncy house, and has amassed over 1.6 billion views. His YouTube channel has over 25 billion views in total and 17 million subscribers. Forbes reports he now has his own line of collectibles selling at Walmart.

 

Ryan lives in Texas, that’s why I described him as Texan.

 

To be honest, that sounds just like me and I am four years old, the age Ryan was when he started reviewing toys.

 

Grandad seems quite (no, very) impressed by the amount of money Ryan is earning. But $22 million means nothing to me. Apparently in the UK it is only worth £17.3 million. Grandad says USA have always made out their money US dollars is worth more than our £ sterling. He blames President Trump for exaggerating it and making out it is bigger than it is. But then again he blames Trump or Brexit does for everything.

 

But as I have said before in my Blog and no doubt will do a trillion times in the future, money has no meaning to me. I do not see a need for it and it seems to have no use except for making massive long caterpillars.

 

I should explain about the caterpillars.  In Grandad’s office he has a glass jar and that glass jar is where he puts any 1p, 2p, or 5p pieces he gets. He chunters on about them being pointless and should be dropped from our currency. What he fails to realise is that due to there being millions and millions of these coins in his jar me and Brother Rory and Cousin George love to be creative with them as they make superb caterpillars.

 

It is not the actual making of the caterpillars that we love it is having something worthwhile to scrap over. It is amazing fun. So that is why this money is so good.

 

Other than fighting over it to make caterpillars I do not see any other point for money at all. Some people say it’s important to buy things. But why do I need to buy things? Mum and Dad provide me with every single thing I need so why would I want money? What could I do with it? It’s just a numbers game.

 

As I find the money meaningless I have to consider this Ryan Toys Review TV programme from an artistic critique viewpoint. I think for all his success it falls down in many areas and leaves huge gaps.

 

If you watch this Ryan guy you will see he has a lot of toys, probably as many as I have, ok, no, I suppose he doesn’t have that many, but he has a lot.

 

I suspect he makes the programmes on Christmas Day or his birthday. How else would you have that many presents to open?

 

But where he falls down is on the content of his show. Where are the Angry Bird toys? Where are the footballs? Where are any ball games?

 

If he was a real well balanced child he would have some Angry Bird toys in there.

 

This is where I see my opening. Ryan was four years old when he started his TV show. He began making YouTube videos in March 2015 after watching other toy review channels like EvanTubeHD and asking his mother “How come I’m not on YouTube when all the other kids are?”

 

That is weird because it is exactly what I am asking now.

 

Ryan’s mother decided to quit her job as a high school chemistry teacher to work on the YouTube channel full-time.

 

My Mum could quit her job as a primary school teacher to work on the YouTube channel full-time. Well, she could if she had my wellbeing close to her heart.

 

There is room for me to plug the gap for reviews of Angry Bird toys. I could show Ryan what he is missing out on.

 

In addition I could review footballs. When was the last time you saw him review a football or even play with a football? Never. And that’s not natural for a boy not to be passionate about football or any ball games and there are lots of them.

 

Except Grandad I suppose. He is not into football or ball games. But that says it all. I rest my case. It is so unnatural.

 

Another thing is, does he actually review the toys or just unpacks them and plays with them? I think you will find it is the latter. He is supposed to be a ‘Toy Critic’. Have you ever heard him criticise a toy? No! The public need someone with balls to review toys. Someone who is prepared to go out there and cut the crap and tell it like it is. They do not want to watch him playing with his toys 24 hours a day. You don’t want to but I end up doing so or would do if Mum or Dad didn’t rudely interrupt and turn the TV off after quarter of an hour.

 

Imagine if I interrupted their TV watching, I would be condemned to two hours on the “Naughty Step” for me!

 

My YouTube TV show would be filmed in the real world too, that of Hucknall, Nottingham, England not in the fake world of Texas.

 

All I need is a good catchy name for my TV station/programme “Ewan Toys Review”. How brilliant is that? That is far better than “Ryan Toys Review”.

 

Finally I need someone to make the programme. Mum would never give up her job like Ryan’s mum did. But just a minute, there’s Grandad. He’s got nothing to do all day. Perfect!

 

Although the downside is that he is very old fashioned in his approach. He thinks state of the art TV is the Old Grey Whistle Test of 1977 or Top of the Pops from 1980 or even Steptoe & Son from 1966. He is hard work but I’m sure I can educate him.

 

I’d better be off to do more research. You can join me with this link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tldlt2RhrDw

 

Bye Bye, Ewan

 

PS I thought I can do my first review here and become famous as a Toy Review Blogger

 

Angry Birds Star Wars 8″ Plush: Luke Skywalker

by Angry Birds

4.1 out of 5 stars

Price:      £7.99 Delivery at no additional cost for Prime Members (and my Mum and Dad and Grandad are Prime Members)

Note: Available at a lower price without Prime delivery from other sellers.

Note: This item is eligible for click and collect. Details

14 new from £6.00 1 used from £4.30

Join an epic adventure with the Angry Birds in the legendary Star Wars universe! Bring home the popular Angry Birds Star Wars as this fun series of collectible plush! Soft and huggable, this 8-inch Angry Bird Star Wars Plush is the perfect gift for your Angry Birds addicted gamer – or yourself! Collect all your favorite feathered Star Wars heroes (and Imperial piggies)!

 

MY CRITIQUE

Wow that looks so good. I would love one

 

Signed: EWAN TOY REVIEW

 

INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE FOR THE DAY

The first one to get angry loses.

HAPPINESS IS…

Happiness is…watching toy reviews on TV 24 hours a day

 GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

One day Youtube, Twitter and Facebook will join together and be called YouTwitFace

LOVE IS…

Love is… an intimate secret

TRACK OF THE DAY

Never Be Anyone Else But You – Ricky Nelson

Highest Chart Position: No.17 19th July 2019

WHAT DAY IS IT?

Friday 22nd March 2019

Goof Off Day

World Water Day

As Young As you Feel Day

 

©2019 Phil M Robinson & jeanniejeanniejeannie.co.uk

 

 

 

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