Five British November traditions that are way better than Thanksgiving

Five British November traditions that are way better than Thanksgiving

jeanniejeanniejeannie.co.uk BLOG Thursday 25th November 2021

 THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

Five British November traditions that are way better than Thanksgiving

It is a while since we had a Daily Mash article but this one is brilliant. The only problem is I had to make an editorial change to item #5 which was not in keeping with the jeanniejeanniejeannie.co.uk policies. We do have children visit this site I’ll have you know!

 ENVIOUS of Americans for their late November festivities? Here’s five homegrown traditions that will make you glad you were born British:

Bonfire night

A Thanksgiving feast of sweet potato with marshmallows or turkey with a blueberry glaze is nothing compared to losing a tooth on bonfire toffee while a scarecrow with a goatee goes up in flames for public-spiritedly attempting to blow up Parliament.

Remembrance Day

Snuggled up in slankets watching the Superbowl, Yanks will never appreciate the simple charm of shutting the f**k up for two minutes and watching some bastard politicians lay a wreath.

Getting angry about early Christmas

With no buffer period between Halloween and Christmas, we Brits get to experience the righteous anger of seeing Christmas decorations up on November 1st while scorning attempt to make Black Friday a thing. It’s beautiful and heartwarming to see.

Strictly Come Dancing

They’ve got Dancing With The Stars over there, but it’s a poor imitation with no wife-swapping. The November build-up to find out who is leaving their long-term spouse to become tabloid fodder for six months is far more wholesome than any family reunion.

Children In Need

Ok, the Americans may have their Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade with their thousands of floats, but its not a patch on our Children In Need where every major star celebrity has to prove the reason they are not comediens by performing a stupid unfunny comedy sketch. And members of the public donate so much money to shut them up.

Taken from The Daily Mash :CHECK OUT Daily Mash with ammendments,

TOP TEN OF THE DAY

Top 21 Things People Eventually Grow Out Of

Things you might’ve liked at some point… but over time you’ve gradually liked less and less. This list is purely subjective.

1              Toys

2              SpongeBob SquarePants

3              Cartoons    (Not Me!)

4              Plush Toys

5              Trick or Treating  (Not Me!)

6              Netflix

7              Nickelodeon

8              Comic Books  (Not Me!)

9              Candy/Sweets

10           Cartoon Network

11           Santa Claus  (Not Me!)

12           Colouring Books

13           Roblox

14           Disney Movies  (Not Me!)

15           TV/Television

16           Beanie Babies

17           Angry Birds

18           Pokemon Cards

19           Diapers – Nappies

20           Dolls

21           Radio 1 and Radio 2

REMEMBER: The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.

– Nicolas Chamfort

 INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE FOR THE DAY

“You are the sum total of everything you’ve ever seen, heard, eaten, smelled, been told, forgot – it’s all there. Everything influences each of us, and because of that I try to make sure that my experiences are positive.” Maya Angelou

HAPPINESS IS…

Happiness is…leaving some naff things behind.

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

(1) Asked to write a composition entitled, “What I’m thankful for on Thanksgiving,” Little Johnny wrote, “I am thankful that I’m not a turkey.”

(2) Q: What would you get if you crossed a turkey with a ghost? A: A poultrygeist!

(3) Q: Why did the turkey cross the road twice? A: To prove he wasn’t chicken!

LOVE IS…

Love is…something to be thankful for.

TURN…TURN…TURN!

A time for Children In Need…A time for Thanksgiving.

YOUR HISTORY

25th November

1703 The Great Storm of 1703, the greatest windstorm ever recorded in the southern part of Great Britain, reached its intensity which it maintained through to 27th November. Winds gusted up to 120 mph, and 9,000 people died.

1823 The first pleasure pier, The Chain Pier at Brighton, opened. It closed in 1896 and was destroyed in a storm in the same year.

1952 The play, The Mousetrap by Agatha Christie, opened in London, at the Ambassador’s Theatre where it remained for 21 years. By Saturday 12th April 1958 it had become the longest running production of any kind in the history of British Theatre.

1984 Band Aid rock stars gathered at Sarm Studios in London to record ‘Do They Know It’s Christmas’, to aid famine relief in Ethiopia.

 

 

©2021 Phil M Robinson