Jeremy Clarkson named ‘Most Painful TV Celeb’
jeanniejeanniejeannie.co.uk BLOG Friday 7th January 2022
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Jeremy Clarkson named ‘Most Painful TV Celeb’ with Gemma Collins not far behind
When it comes to being a pain in the neck, no one induces whiplash better than Jeremy Clarkson.
That’s the conclusion of a mission to find the nation’s greatest irritations.
The Grand Tour host has been named Most Painful TV Celebrity in a study investigating social media for negative public reaction to telly stars.
Using “sentiment analysis”, researchers did an online trawl on posts for words such as irritating, annoying, cringe, embarrassing, pain and painful linked to big names.
And Clarkson, 61, gathered the most with a score of 90% negative sentiment. TOWIE veteran Gemma Collins was Most Painful Reality TV Star with 70%, while Nigel Farage was named Most Painful Politician with an 84% score.
Miranda Hart turned out to be no laughing matter as the Most Painful Comic with 77% negative sentiment, while Emmerdale and Married At First Sight lifted the gongs for Most Painful Soap and Most Painful Reality Show.
In the world of sport, the Most Painful Football Pundit was outspoken Manchester United legend Roy Keane
At the other end of the scale, the pain relief experts at B-Cure Laser UK found This Morning ’s Holly Willoughby highly commended with 83% of positive sentiment.
Labour’s Sir Keir Starmer notched 68% and former party leader Jeremy Corbyn 66%.
The famous names we find most irritating:
– Most Painful TV Celebrity – Jeremy Clarkson (90.7%)
– Most Painful Politician – Nigel Farage (84.4%)
– Most Painful Reality TV Star – Gemma Collins (70.1%)
– Most Painful Comic – Miranda Hart (78.6%)
– Most Painful Reality TV Show – Married At First Sight (76.6%)
– Most Painful TV Soap – Emmerdale (79.3%)
– Most Painful Football Pundits – Roy Keane (81.9%)
By Laura Connor
TOP TEN OF THE DAY
TOP TEN B-sides that should have been A-sides
- “Green Onions”, Booker T and the MGs: B-side to “Behave Yourself”, 1962.
- “A Change Is Gonna Come”, Sam Cooke: “Shake”, 1964.
- “You Can’t Always Get What You Want”, the Rolling Stones: “Honky Tonk Women”, 1969.
- “Your Song”, Elton John: “Take Me to the Pilot”, 1970.
- “Bell Bottom Blues”, Derek and the Dominos: “Layla”, 1971.
- “Maggie May” by Rod Stewart: “Reason to Believe”, 1971.
- “The Man Who Sold the World”, David Bowie: B-side to reissue of “Life on Mars?”, 1973.
- “Liza Radley”, The Jam: “Start!”, 1980.
- “How Soon Is Now?” The Smiths: “William, It Was Really Nothing”, 1984, had two songs on the B-side, the other being “Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want”, which should also have been an A-side.
- “Half the World Away”, Oasis, the B-side to “Whatever”, 1994.
REMEMBER: The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.
– Nicolas Chamfort
INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE FOR THE DAY
I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they’re right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. – Unknown
Happiness is… Jeremy Clarkson.
GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY
What’s the difference between an iceberg and a clothes brush? One crushes boats and the other brushes coats!
Love is…not about what’s on the table but who is around the table.
A time for Jeremy Clarkson…A time for Holly Willoughby
MUSIC, MUSIC, MUSIC!
Hitting Number 1 on the Official Chart isn’t easy. In the countdown’s 69-year history, over 1,000 songs have been left out in the cold in the runner-up slot – and some acts have a nasty habit of missing out a lot of times. Who has the most No.2s.
CRAZY FOR YOU 1985
LIVE TO TELL 1986
HANKY PANKY 1990
JUSTIFY MY LOVE 1990
CRAZY FOR YOU (REMIX) 1991
RAY OF LIGHT 1998
BEAUTIFUL STRANGER 1999
AMERICAN LIFE 2003
ME AGAINST THE MUSIC (WITH BRITNEY SPEARS) 2003
Cliff Richard (11)
Including his solo singles and his work credited with The Shadows and The Drifters, Cliff has notched up a staggering 11 near-miss singles, the most for among male artists, and British acts. Ironically, Move It is Cliff’s first and last Number 2; the song was Cliff & The Drifters’ debut single back in 1958, and was then re-recorded as part of a double a-side in 2006, packaged with 21st Century Christmas.
MOVE IT [CLIFF RICHARD & THE DRIFTERS] 1958
VOICE IN THE WILDERNESS [CLIFF RICHARD & THE SHADOWS] 1960
FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU [CLIFF RICHARD & THE SHADOWS] 1960
I’M LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW/DO YOU WANT TO DANCE 1962
IT’LL BE ME 1962
IT’S ALL IN THE GAME 1963
DON’T TALK TO HIM 1963
WIND ME UP (LET ME GO) 1965
DADDY’S HOME 1981
THE BEST OF ME 1989
21ST CENTURY CHRISTMAS/MOVE IT 2006
Kylie Minogue (11)
In an alternate universe, Kylie Minogue actually has 18 UK Number 1 singles, one more than The Beatles. However in this dark, dark timeline, Kylie has 7 chart toppers and a whopping 11 songs that stopped short of the mountain top.
GOT TO BE CERTAIN 1988
THE LOCO-MOTION 1988
JE NE SAIS PAS POURQUOI 1988
WOULDN’T CHANGE A THING 1989
BETTER THE DEVIL YOU KNOW 1990
GIVE ME JUST A LITTLE MORE TIME 1992
CONFIDE IN ME 1994
ON A NIGHT LIKE THIS 2000
KIDS [WITH ROBBIE WILLIAMS] 2000
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT 2002
I BELIEVE IN YOU 2004
MORE: 50 golden chart facts about Kylie Minogue
Elvis Presley (9)
Elvis being, you know, the King, he’ll feature in every trivia list we will ever produce, and he rears his very talented head in this rundown too, with nine Number 2s to his name.
HEARTBREAK HOTEL 1956
HOUND DOG 1956
HARD HEADED WOMAN 1958
KING CREOLE 1958
A MESS OF BLUES 1960
IN THE GHETTO 1969
SUSPICIOUS MINDS 1969
Including Elvis’ series of singles reissues from the 2000s, Elvis has 17 Number 2 hits, as nine of his previous Number 1s re-entered the chart at Number 2.
Barbadian bad gal Rihanna has been killing it on the Official Singles Chart for over a decade, racking up nine chart toppers. She also has the same number of second place hits, her first being her debut smash Pon De Replay, with her most recent being Calvin Harris hook-up This Is What You Came For. Rihanna can even claim to have the best-selling song of 2010 with Love The Way You Lie, despite it going no higher than Number 2. Not so bad after all, right?
PON DE REPLAY 2005
LIVE YOUR LIFE [WITH T.I] 2008
RUSSIAN ROULETTE 2009
RUDE BOY 2010
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE [WITH EMINEM] 2010
WORK [FT. DRAKE] 2016
THIS IS WHAT YOU CAME FOR [WITH CALVIN HARRIS] 2016
MORE: The best-selling singles of all time on the Official UK Chart
Michael Jackson (8)
Michael Jackson actually has more Number 2s than Number 1s on the UK’s Official Chart, with eight. He also has eight Number 3s, but we’ll get to that another time. MJ’s most recent song to sit in the shadow of the top spot is 2018’s Don’t Matter To Me with Drake.
SAY SAY SAY [WITH PAUL MCCARTNEY] 1983
LEAVE ME ALONE 1989
HEAL THE WORLD 1992
GIVE IN TO ME 1993
WHY [WITH 3T] 1996
YOU ROCK MY WORLD 2001
MAN IN THE MIRROR* 2009
DON’T MATTER TO ME [WITH DRAKE] 2018
*Man In The Mirror originally peaked at Number 21 in 1988 before reaching Number 2 following Michael’s death in 2009.
Justin Timberlake (7)
Many of Justin Timberlake’s songs feel like they’d have Number 1 written all over them, but seven of them have narrowly missed out on chart topping glory. JT’s first three singles Like I Love You, Cry Me A River and Rock Your Body all peaked at Number 2, as did his feel-good 2016 hit Can’t Stop The Feeling, which was stuck behind Drake’s One Dance for four weeks.
LIKE I LOVE YOU 2002
CRY ME A RIVER 2003
ROCK YOUR BODY 2003
SIGNS [WITH SNOOP DOGG AND CHARLIE WILSON] 2005
MY LOVE [FT. T.I.] 2006
AYO TECHNOLOGY [WITH 50 CENT AND TIMBALAND] 2007
CAN’T STOP THE FEELING 2016
Calvin Harris (7)
Calvin Harris knows a thing or two about hits. In addition to his 10 massive chart topping hits, Calvin has seven Number 2s under his belt. The first was 2011’s Bounce with Kelis while the latest is 2019’s Giant with Rag’n’Bone Man.
BOUNCE [ 2011
FEELS SO CLOSE 2011
LET’S GO 2012
WE’LL BE COMING BACK 2012
HOW DEEP IS YOUR LOVE 2015
THIS IS WHAT YOU’VE CAME FOR 2016
6 Number 2s:
Queen, Boyzone, Oasis, Robbie Williams, Justin Bieber.
5 Number 2s:
The Beatles, Tom Jones, The Sweet, U2, George Michael, Sash!, Steps, S Club, Girls Aloud.
©2022 Phil M Robinson