Planet 5


R U JOKING, GRANDAD BLOG   2nd October 2017

Today we land on Planet 5, the special planet that 5 year old children are on. Touch down is Monday 2nd of October 2017, Grandson Rory’s birthday.

The next inhabitant will be his cousin, our granddaughter Freya.

Then after a couple of years Rory’s brother Ewan and Freya’s brother George will hopefully find themselves on Planet 5.

Planet 5 is one of the most amazing planets we land on in life. The nearest thing to it is Planet  65 but that is a lot further away and takes years longer to travel to.

So let me tell you all about Planet 5.

It takes five years to reach Planet 5 – see the picture of it above. In fact you begin preparing your journey for nine months before your journey starts in earnest,

Throughout your journey to Planet 5 you experiment with things you will be expected to do and the adventures you will have on Planet 5. On the journey you are trained to get the best from Planet 5.

And what is on Planet 5.

So many exciting things, like real school, proper paperback story books to read, and the ability to read them. Super heroes are everywhere and their mission to entertain, inspire and protect.

Planet 5 is a world of limitless imagination, where story books come true. It is a world of animation, of space and underwater exploration; a world of song, swimming and dancing.

It is a world where anything is possible. A world inhabited by Trolls, Princes and Princesses, Dangermouse, Spiderman, Batman and Superman and animated jungle animals. Of castles and palaces, of islands and Big Dark Woods.

There are giants and baddies and Big Bad Mice, monsters, aliens, witches and dragons that spit fire and bite.

On Planet 5 technology rules and knowledge is the food for hungry minds to feed on.

Planet 5 has no boundaries. Its raw materials are Lego bricks, paper, pens, pencils and art materials.

Cycles, scooters and horses head handles are the main form of transport. Theme parks replace villages, towns and cities. You get your thrills on swings, slides, roundabouts.

To celebrate landing on Planet 5 you just have to party at a major hall with a theme like Trolls, have a castle to bounce on and soft play. You’ve got to have a balloon artist, too, for what’s a party without a balloon artist?

There needs to be food, lots and lots of food and drink.

All of this climaxes with the CAKE! An amazing Troll Cake created by the best cake maker in the world ever… (Note: it is very important it is made by the best cake maker in the world ever…) With A Cherry On Top – Kirkby in Ashfield See the range, anything is possible at :

The candles are lit everyone sings “Happy Birthday to Rory”. He blows out all the candles with one massive puff. And his life on Planet 5 commences.

Come on Freya, you’re next. Prepare to land.

Grandad of course is chief scribe and will report back on life on Planet 5 as it progresses.

Happy Birthday, Rory. Have a great day. Welcome to Planet 5.



Trouble knocked on the door, but hearing laughter, hurried away. Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)


Happiness is…Rory’s 5th Birthday


Why do women (particularly Mamma) always ask questions that have no right answers?


You Got What It Takes – Marv Johnson

Highest chart position No.7 – 10th March 1960